We Have All Been A "No-Face"

Musings on our external environment and how it influences us more than we think.

Have you ever been a “No-Face” in this world?

Like this intriguing character in Hayao Miyazaki’s Spirited Away (2001), perhaps you have felt lost or confused, not knowing who you are, not having a direction, nor a voice you can express well.

Living as an empty black blob of a spirit, all you can utter is a docile and desperate “ah, ah, ah” as you reach out eagerly in hope of getting validation or belonging somewhere.

You readily inherit the identities and demeanours of the people you encounter, and take on the qualities of every place you find yourself in.

And when you unfortunately stumble into a toxic environment, you also become toxic, as No-Face had when he wandered into Yubaba’s bathhouse in the film.

In a bid to overcome the loneliness and emptiness he was feeling, he swallowed the bathhouse workers who were pandering to him for gold.

The greed in the environment immediately manifested within No-Face; he grew frog-like limbs and took on the toady voice of the worker he ate. And it seemed like the more he was fed, the more hungry and insatiable his appetite became.

It was only when Chihiro - the protagonist of the story and the human with whom No-Face felt a connection - stuffed a magic fruit in his mouth in a bid to stop his monstrosity, did the once-innocent spirit purge all the poisons he had consumed and eventually reverted to his gentle, childlike form.

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Deep down there is a core part of us that never stops seeking what is pure and wholesome.

And when we find it or rediscover it, we know it is home.

I believe this purity and wholesomeness resides within us all the time.

My favourite scene in the movie is Chihiro beckoning No-Face to sit down beside her on the train. They sit silently side-by-side throughout the ride. Those were precious moments, because at the start of the story No-Face was first attracted to Chihiro’s authenticity and compassion, but this attraction turned into an obsession for a while.

Nearing the end of the movie, No-Face continues to follow Chihiro around, but appears to be more at ease. There is now an absence of the yearning that dominated their interactions.

I have seen Spirited Away multiple times now. It wasn’t until my third watch that it struck me - I mentally pointed at No-Face and silently exclaimed:

That’s me! I am No-Face!

I often reflect on how much of ourselves is a mirror of our environment.

A Chinese proverb goes as such:

近朱者赤，近墨者黑.

jìn zhū zhě chì, jìn mò zhě hēi

“We turn red when we are near red dye, we turn black when we are near black ink.”